Meeting Elena Arzak

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The photographs from 2009 lacked the withered, yellowed appearance that one would expect of old photos.  There was no mold, no dust, no opportunity to romanticize the experience of flicking through the pictures and feeling the  brittle plastic sheet from the photo album rustle beneath my fingers.  In this decade, photographs are merely a collection of millions of pixels without the benefit of exposure to light or dust.  There is no burning of pictures to exorcise memories; you merely hit the delete button and everything is gone.

I pressed the right arrow key over and over and over again, each tap of the key hitting a different nerve within my body, an ache despite the lack of physical contact other than my index finger tap tap tapping on the arrow key as picture after picture from another time appear on my 15-inch monitor.

There are no pictures of our meal at Arzak in 2009.

******

We were staying at a B&B in San Sebastián which we eventually discovered was owned by a rather reputable restaurateur in the town.  We didn’t know any Spanish, and he and his employees knew little English, but like love and music, the love of food formed that shaky bridge of understanding.

Arzak was fully booked, but the B&B owner managed to get us a table one sunny afternoon. Elena Arzak personally greeted us and led us to our table beside the kitchen.  After spending some time getting to know us, she disappeared into the kitchen.  What eventually came out was food that was visually magnificent with unexpected flavours and surprising textures.  I don’t have the autographed menu with me anymore, nor do I have any pictures thanks to a strict ruling at the restaurant with respect to the photographing of food, but how can I forget the fresh, juicy mussels with rice vinegar, or the mushroom popcorn, or the lotus root with a mousse made of fish, or the figs, jam-like in texture with caramelised bits and foie gras that melts in the mouth, or the lobster served with crispy potato with an unusual texture, or the poached egg with sesame and seaweed, or the monkfish with olive oil in spherical shapes that had the appearance of bronze metallic paint, or onions cooked and flattened to resemble paper which was then painted on, or pigeon with silver, blue potato juice in blue globes, or strawberry soup and orange with red wine and sesame sugar.  The images and flavours are etched in my memory.  “Why are you smiling?” he asks.  “Because I’m happy,” I reply.

If there is one meal in my life that I never want to forget, this is it.

As we prepared to leave the restaurant, Elena Arzak presented me with an autographed copy of her book.  “You may not understand the language,” she smiled, “but it is a small gift to you so that you remember your time at Arzak.”  I wondered why she would give me a gift  as precious as this.

Her one message to me which I remember to this day is this: “There are people who save up a whole year to be able to dine at our restaurant, and there are people who can afford to dine daily here.  We recognise that, and we treat everyone equally.”

******

We walked along the sandy beach of San Sebastian, the breeze gently lifting the frills of my blouse.  I watched the children build sandcastles and laughed at the faith of fools and a misplaced sense of confidence in an eternity that is so easily washed away with  the rising tides.

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A picture of Elena’s father, Juan Mari Arzak, and Elena’s autograph.

 Note: In 2012, Elena Arzak was voted The Veuve Clicquot World Best Female Chef.  The restaurant is currently ranked 8th in the world on the San Pellegrino World’s 50 Best Restaurants list.

Arzak
Av del Alcalde José Elosegi, 273, 20015 Donostia-San Sebastián,
Spain.
Website

The birthday cake that could

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I am an accountant, and to a certain extent, I fit the stereotype associated with accountants.  I am an introvert and I am risk-averse.  Change is something that I view as an absolute last resort.  At this point, my friend, Fatboybakes, will probably sputter out an incoherent string of words that will probably include “guffaw”, “roll eyes” and “delusional”.  Public events scare me.  If you don’t want someone to be your friend on Facebook, tell them you’re an accountant.  *crickets*  Oh look, there’s Jules…I haven’t seen him in awhile…ta!  It’s worse if you’re an auditor.  You may as well whip out your mobile phone and exclaim, “Oh dear, my boss is trying to reach me!”, then seek out the darkest corner and play Candy Crush alone for the rest of the evening.

When you’re forced into a situation of change, you have no choice but to swim.  What used to scare you at night now scares you even when your eyes are wide open.  Everything becomes amplified. and soon you become your worst nightmare and you begin to do things that are destructive because you think that when you’re hurting, the whole world will hurt with you.

The fact is, and this is clearly evident in the current times, people have short term memories and what may be sensational this hour will be old news in the next.  We live in a disposable world.  People, objects, memories…they’re all replaceable.

The remedy?  Embrace the change, acknowledge the cause and problem, and fill that void.

To put things simply, I cooked.  I cooked ferociously, day and night, and even when there was no one to eat the food, I’d still cook.

When Bongo Lee told me that she was throwing a birthday party for her brother, I offered to bake the birthday cake.  But here’s the thing – my track record, as far as baking is concerned, is pitiful.  If you have been a reader of this blog since its inception, you may have laughed at some of my struggles (links HERE and HERE).  The oven has always been my enemy.  Nevertheless, I wanted to do this.  There was no back-up plan.

I’d been meaning to try the butter cake recipe from WendyinKK’s blog, named after her friend, Mrs Ng SK, who gave her the recipe, so I thought this would be the perfect opportunity for me to try it.  It was past midnight when I took out my pans, feeling somewhat intoxicated from the drinks and hokkien mee that I had consumed earlier at The Moon Bar, and I became Nigella, boobs and all.  Adamant that this would not be a repeat performance of my 2008 baking disasters, I followed the recipe to a T.  A couple of hours later, I was staring at my masterpiece.  It was a work of art.

The next morning, I had bigger ambitions for the cake.  I had this sudden brilliant idea that I would sandwich the cake with lemon curd, then coat it completely with lemon butter cream.  My only problem was that the existing cake was too low to be sliced horizontally into two.  Solution?  Bake another cake for the top half.  So with barely a couple of hours to go before my lunch appointment with my parents, I set out to bake the second cake.  This time, Nigella did not materialise.  I was Usain Bolt as I moved at lightning speed.  In a little over an hour, my cake was done.  It was another masterpiece.  I set out to my parents’ place, pleased as Punch.

When I got home after lunch, I decided to slowly work on the construction of the square cake.  After whipping the lemon butter cream and preparing the lemon curd, I assembled the cake.  It looked somewhat lopsided, but I figured that the butter cream frosting would take care of that.  So I painstakingly coated it, layer after layer, with the frosting.  I was meticulous, adding a millimetre here and a millimetre there, but after the umpteeth time of frosting, chucking it in the fridge, then frosting it again, I realised that the cake was destined to look like an amateurish effort at best.

I looked at it sadly and made the executive decision not to serve it at the birthday party.

I am an accountant, and I have this idea of perfection, the devil being in the details and all, and I thought it an abomination to serve something so imperfect to people I barely knew.  I wanted to disappear into a corner and play Candy Crush.

It wasn’t just a cake to me.  It was a projection of the unspoken insecurities and a desire for affirmation.

A couple of days later, I served it to some friends.  They tried it and said that it was good.  I got the affirmation I wanted, but I realised that I was doing it the wrong way.

I am studying the book of Jeremiah now and the following verses in Jeremiah 29 have been seared into my heart –

11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Maybe there is hope for me yet.

Recipe HERE.

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A Pot of Gold – Bacon Jam

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When I mentioned my obsession with bacon to my brother who lives in the UK, he sniffed, “We don’t eat bacon for breakfast these days.  It’s peasant food.”

I’d like to see him tell mum that.  She lives in Klang, a place she claims is barren of good bacon.  I am literally expected to bring home the bacon every time I visit, failing which she’d serve me broth without any bread and whip me soundly before putting me to bed.

I am an internet junkie, reading anything from Malaysiakini to Martha Stewart’s Delicious Food Recipes, and one day I chanced upon Martha Stewart’s bacon jam recipe.  It involved using a slow cooker, something which I didn’t have at that time, so I put it off to another day.  I eventually bought myself a cheap 3.3 litre slow cooker, and my culinary journey took a different, but positive direction from then on.

The reception towards my homemade bacon jam varied greatly.  Some said it tasted like siu pau (barbecued pork bun) and politely told me that it was marketable, while my mum said perceptively, “There’s alcohol in it, Meena”.  It would have been okay except that she suffers from alcohol intolerance (she breaks out in rashes), and being the good daughter that I am, I fed her not only the bacon jam made with 15-year-old single malt whisky, but also a boozey tiramisu later that night.  Relax.  The amounts were negligible anyway, hardly enough to cause a small bump in the skin, and she slept well that night.

Ironically enough, I didn’t use the slow cooker to make the bacon jam in the end.  The problem with the slow cooker recipe is that one needs to cook it for 3 1/2 to 4 hours on high (or probably about 6 hours on low), but I work in an accounting firm with minimum working hours of 12 hours a day which basically meant that 1) I can never get a tan; and 2) I can never cook bacon jam in a slow cooker.

I followed the ingredients in the recipe to a T, so it’s pointless reproducing it here, but the steps obviously differ because of the no-slow cooker thingy.  After frying the bacon, onions and garlic, and adding cider vinegar, maple syrup, sugar and coffee, I cooked it over low heat on the stove for about an hour, then cooled it down before blitzing it in the food processor till I got it to my preferred consistency.  It then went back to the stove again before I added in a glug of whisky and simmered it for a further 15 minutes. (Note: There is no mention of whisky in the Martha Stewart version, but I think it should be in as it makes a world of a difference.  It’s non-halal already anyway, innit?)

The bacon jam goes wonderfully with cheeses and roast meats.  I even ate it with mum’s nasi lemak last weekend, whereupon mum bestowed upon me her biggest frown for contaminating a much revered local favourite with the likes of Martha Stewart.  Mum’s a stickler for tradition, and I’m a rebel, but she humours me anyway.  Well, sometimes.

I still have some left over in my fridge, this beautiful pot of gold with its sticky, smoky, syrupy, delectable relish.   I asked a dear friend once, in rhetoric, about my elusive rainbow and pot of gold.  She said, “It will get better.  Just focus on the now”.  And I did just that.

“No more did I need to roam.
In all that time I was searching for that pot of gold,
It was with my family and friends, at home.”

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